18 09 20

1. Notes Toward a Theo­ry of the Crush, Crush’s Dis­course, Ma Vie en Crush.

2. Tableau vivant of extant crushes with pos­si­bi­li­ty of sexual consum­ma­tion deter­mi­ning cen­tra­li­ty.

3. Tableau vivant of for­mer crushes, all asleep on the floor.

4. Hid­den track of emba­ras­sing crushes on an other­wise unlis­te­nable album.

5. Regar­ding the crush of never-to-be-lovers, these sub­ca­te­go­ries : the never-to-be-lovers of who is alrea­dy spo­ken for ; the never-to-be-lovers of geo­gra­phi­cal impos­si­bi­li­ty ; the never-to-be-lovers of sexual incom­pa­ti­bi­li­ty ; the never-to-be-lovers of the nar­cis­sism of small dif­fe­rences ; the never-to-be-lovers of asym­me­tri­cal desire.

6. Some spe­cies of crushes : the crush of inter­sec­ting research inter­ests, the crush of good poli­tics, the crush of great poems, the crush of proxi­mi­ty, the crush of lack of proxi­mi­ty, the crush on who you’ve never met, the crush on whoe­ver sits next to you and begins to talk, the crush on the high­ly infor­med gos­sip, the crush on who leads with cruel­ty and ends with affec­tion, the crush on who leads with affec­tion and ends with cruel­ty, the crush on whoe­ver you are content to observe, the crush on who you think could use a lit­tle more edu­ca­tion, the crush on a figh­ting spi­rit.

7. And what are the ter­ri­to­ries beyond the ter­ri­to­ry of the crush ? Roman­tic love ? Sex ? Friend­ship ? Apa­thy ? Lite­ra­ry jour­nals ? Unsent emails ? Armed cells ?

Anne Boyer, « Crush Index », in A hand­book of disap­poin­ted fate, Ugly duck­ling, 2019, p. 98–99